11.11.11 witnessed the launch of a new entity: the Anarchic Mauritian Front (AMF) at le Caudan, opposite Place d’Armes. The AMF is a new breed of association which takes its modus operandi from the global Occupy movement, i.e. it is essentially leaderless. It’s nominated spokesperson for the day can be quoted as saying nothing. However, it is understood that the AMF describes itself, somewhat paradoxically, as “a Political Anti-Party” and rather immodestly as “the Party to end all Parties”. What will happen once its objectives are achieved? Apparently “the After-Party”!

The unofficial website of the Anti-Party, occupy.mu, also came on-line yesterday. Traffic is currently being redirected to its Facebook page until the site is fully developed. A recent post illustrates one of the tactics of the AMF, namely to assassinate the character of political leaders in the national consciousness through scathing satire. Such an approach has been used widely in the UK , for example, by the subversive “Spitting Image” on the Independent Television Network during the 1980s and 90s. Their caricatures included painting Margaret Thatcher as  a bullying tyrant and cross-dresser and Ronald Reagan as a bumbling, nuke-obsessed fool. As Mauritians are still denied private local television, AMF will broadcast over the Internet using YouTube, taunting “the Leader” to deny access to the site and hence reveal his flagrant disregard for Constitutionally-guaranteed human rights, in this case, freedom of expression.

At 11:11:11 am precisely, the spokesperson, “King Richard”, turned to face the sea to reveal the name of the entity’s website hastily scrawled on his coronation gown. After the “re-turn of  the King” he exposed his rod to an awestruck crowd that had “magically” coalesced (in flagrant disregard of the Public Gathering Act 1991 which expressly prohibits the spontaneous assembly of 12 or more persons). This does not refer to a part of his anatomy, but to the sceptre in his right hand – a symbol of his Divine Right to rule the land. Of course this is a joke, it is not a real sceptre, but merely a plastic copy of the one crafted for the “Heretic” Egyptian Pharaoh, Akenaton, and subsequently wielded by Agamemnon, “Steadfast” King of Mycenae and later by the Norman King, Richard the First of England, known as “Coeur de Lion”. Incidentally, the silent spokesperson refers to himself as “the Abnormal King, Richard the Worst, Queue de Lion” [literal translation: “big cat’s tail”].

After occupying le Caudan for a few minutes, King Richard marched to occupy Place d’Armes, where he photographed himself with the statues of other great men of Mauritian history. He then moved on through Company Gardens, towards the headquarters of the MMM where he was rejected by Rajesh Bigwhig. However, he was able to discuss matters of mutual interest with Ananda Rajoo, Chief Editor of the Militant and frequent victim of false arrest. Apparently the topics of conversation included the freedom of the press and the probable popular revolution within the Labour Party and the decapitation of its misogynistic head. Also on the agenda was the systemic defilement of the Civil Service by Sir Binhod Bacha (not to be confused with Dennis the Menace’s dog, Basher), the coup d’Etat that removed him from power and his sinister return to the heart of Government as special advisor to Navin Ramgoolam (irreverently referred to as the “Grinning Gibbon“).

Finally, King Richard visited the Lambic public bar where he was served a hearty salad accompanied by the very last bottle of a light German beer called “F*cking Hell”, named after the Austrian village of Fucking. It seemed appropriate. Other strange coincidences included the number of the parking space that the King was allocated at the Granary car park – 111. The King of Comedy also observed that 11.11.11 in base 5 is equivalent to decimal 6.6.6! After a hard day’s folly, Richard retired to an evening retreat with “Buddha”, where he practised one of Osho’s dynamic meditations in the company of some intoxicating peasant girls from England. (The parallel with Krishna did not cross his mind for one moment and if it had he was spoiled for choice in terms of selecting his own Radha. However, his thoughts may well have turned towards the Matrix;)

[Note to editors: The acronym AMF should not be confused with totally unrelated terms such as the US Military’s “Air and Maritime/Fixed” communications systems; nor the tagline from the popular film the A-Team – “Alpha-Mike-Foxtrot” or “Adios Mother F….”. The broach securing the king’s gown is not a depiction of the flag of St George, but a 7 pointed leaf on a red cross – the symbol of medical marijuana.]